Behind My Eyes

What sight cant tell that my heart feels..
Never written the same words twice, is the image of true life into posts and notes.

I am a split image of my mother.. diferent from my sisters but of the same blood we are.

Not what I see in the mirror is a soul unfelt. Untouched to this earthly life that i was born to.

Sight reveals a broken spirit, open heart & trampled emotions. I am not supposed to feel... Life.

No explanation of thoughts, but unforsaken pain. Truth expressed and delivered for others to embrace, but I am not recieved.
Meaning not percieved or incorporated into their heads.

Brains not rotating the meanings I preach. Not expelled back into open ears.

Once preparing to conquer fears and take on challenges of life to perservere.... I do not see the winning contestant in front of me.

I have fallen, two feet behind the loser that beat the race for me.
Goals unaccomplished to my racing hands and mind. I have not prepared for this defeat.

Seeing the medals pass before my presence, I reach for the finish line and tumble to my knees. Laid down to my demise. I have lost. Myself.

Broken spirit, praying hands, wrapped to prayer beads... Deep prayer makes deeper thinking. Deeper thinking expells deeper feelings. Deeper feelings makes a broken heart release..

Tears.

Behind My Eyes.